Get rich, change the world

Created on Sunday, April 30, 2006.
Filed under .

So here’s how it’s going down. I’m a month and a bit from turning eighteen, and if I’m lucky and don’t get cut down in my prime by a disease or stray bullet or blazing comet, that leaves me fifty-two years to change the world.

I figure that I need money to make as many people as possible listen to what I’m saying, so the first course of action is to get rich. Like, super freakin’ rich, man. I’ll start a pastry business with my mum (she knows what she’s doing), enter commodity trading when I have enough capital to go on, and buy weekly lottery tickets. I mean, who knows how lucky I could be?

At this point I should be worth a few million, so I’ll probably sign some deals with charities like Lifeline, promising to pay a large amount of their running costs for ever. Then I would probably organise some kind of publicity stunt. Maybe some sort of World’s Biggest Petit Four event. Imagine the plausibilities!

I should dedicate all this good work to posterity, but also remember to stay clear away from leftist causes. Nothing turns people off philanthropy faster than a rich man spouting pity the poor people like I do rhetoric.

Now that my reputation is firmly entrenched and I have enough money and resources to do what I want, I should begin experimenting to solve one of the world’s biggest problems. I’m thinking sanitation and water in Africa, or a truly renewable vehicle, or retarding erosion or salination.

But let’s not make it a big secret that I’m doing all this for personal glory, so that I won’t be forgotten when all my dust has settled. Would it really matter that I was doing this for me, even if so many people would have been helped in the process? Does the means justify the end?

That's all there is, there isn't any more.
© Desi Quintans, 2002 – 2018.